Has it seriously been two months since I posted. Wow! Time sure flies when you don’t have any! Let’s see what has been taking up all my time?
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October 3, 2009
July 25, 2009
I’ve got a million half finished posts, and if I keep waiting for coherence it’s never going to happen so I will have to resort to Random Bullets of Crap.
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June 16, 2009
I haven’t written much about weight, in truth because I really didn’t give a damn about it with everything else that’s been going on and frankly, I’m OK, no actually, I’m thrilled about that. Anytime weight is not something I’m thinking about it’s a good thing – unless I’m not thinking of it in an escapist, “if I pretend I haven’t gain 2o lbs then maybe I haven’t gained them” way.
June 10, 2009
LittleC slept through the night – well, I know I did, I still have to confirm that he did! I put LittleC down in his bassinet at about 11 pm. I think I heard him cry around midnight. I had swaddled him in a receiving blanket and had I used either the miracle blanket or the swaddle me, I don’t think he would have woken up. Anyway Mr. CC had the first shift and he got him down again. I woke up feeling surprisingly rested trying to figure out what had woken me up – no alarms, no crying. About 5 minutes later I hear crying and Mr.CC says ‘We have a hungry boy’. I stumble into the nursery and start feeding him and realize it’s 4:30 am. I slept for 5 hours!! I have to quiz Mr.CC to find out if LittleC was asleep the entire time, but I do know that he skipped his 1 am feed. He’s done that a couple of times and it certainly makes life more bearable for me. And here I am at 6 am having a cup of tea while LittleC sleeps.
June 7, 2009
I’m doing something I swore I would never do – worrying about developmental milestones. LittleC doesn’t really do the social smiles yet – once in a while he’ll do something that maybe, could be, if the light hits it just right, and you’re his desperate-to-believe-it’s-a-smile mother, be a smile. There are definitely times his expression changes when he sees me and he seems to be trying to smile. But a full smile, nope. And those goddamn emails I signed up for from babycenter.com and whattoexpect.com are driving me mad. According to those emails, at four weeks he’s supposed to be giving social smiles. And then I go onto the message boards on these sites and women are claiming that their two week old babies are smiling.
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June 3, 2009
or really more sleep… Part of being a new mom and having no sleep is that it makes you unable to problem solve and everything seems like a huge deal. I realized yesterday that for the last two weeks I’ve been doing the entire night shift, from 10pm to about 6 am. I’m not really sure why I started this.
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June 2, 2009
So, I have to say this somewhere – I’m in a really tough and dark place right now. The lack of sleep is really doing a number on me, and Mr. CC and I are not in a very good spot right now. Without going into too much detail about private matters, he’s dropped the ball on certain things and that will put us in a very tough position in the short run. We are going to be strapped financially and may be even incurring some debt, and we are (but mostly, I am) going to have deal with bullshit from his family that is very hurtful.
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June 1, 2009
…is now the holy grail in this family. I’m beginning to get a little bit desperate. LittleC slept from 10pm to 3pm a few (two? three? many? a life time?) nights ago and since then has not slept more than 1.5 hours at a stretch at night. Before that he would go about 3 hours at a stretch at least. Now he’ll sleep for a 3-4 hour stretch during the day if he’s being held by somebody, but other than that nada. Nothing seems to work for very long. I’m so confused about what I should be doing.
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May 21, 2009
I really suck at posting regularly, and having a newborn definitely makes it harder. Lets see, to catch you up since we last spoke about the pregnancy (umm yeah, I just read that post again, a little whiny, wouldn’t you say?). I had gestational diabetes – I moped, ranted and raved, and then found it surprisingly easy. I’ve been focusing on controlling carbs for a while and have worked my way through a variety of diets – Zone, Protein Power, Atkins – and counting carbs wasn’t tough for me at all. Of course, I did have my moments of ‘I want cake and I want it now’, but for the most part it was OK – having the little creature in me and worrying about the impact of cake on him definitely prevented me from cheating too much. I did have the occasional lapse, but on the whole kept the numbers pretty low.
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May 14, 2009
I turn 36 today – officially a old hag now. It’s been a big year – getting married, changing jobs and leaving academia, and of course welcoming little c into our lives. Yup, he’s here. Arrived 2 weeks early on April 15th – I’ve been writing his birth story in dribs and drabs and hope to put it up here soon. I definitely want a record of it and this is as good a place to put it as any.
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